anglea-lange homefront news: Remembering Loss...Enjoying New Life

"There is an occasion for everything,
and a time for every activity under heaven:
a time to give birth and a time to die;"

Ecclesiastes 3:1-2a

Today marks the second month of Tom's real life in heaven...eternity! I'm wondering if my two months of separation from him has any concept to his soul there. I do know that :

"Dear friends, don’t let this one thing escape you:

With the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day."

2 Peter 3:8

I wondered today as I drove East to Newark, Ohio in the dreary rain, if heaven has seasons. I sure don't enjoy the cold, damp and gloomy days of winter...especially not being able to cozy up on the couch with a roaring fire and my best friend. At times I feel so alone...and yet God continues to remind me...when a friend shows up to give me a manicure (Thanks, Ingrid)...or calls me just to check in (Thanks, Ginny)...or comes over to watch a movie (Thanks, Suzanne)...or sends me flowers (Thanks, Monday Girls)...or just wants to "hang out" (Thanks, Carylee)...or makes me dinner even when she doesn't like to cook (Thanks, Lori)...or sends a card (Thanks, everyone)...or offers a back massage (Thanks, Margaret)...or time to bake Christmas cookies (Thanks, Sarah)...or sends me a text of encouragement (Thanks, Terri)...a letter from a sister who knows what it's like to lose a husband (Thanks, Anna)...a gift of warm, wool socks (Thanks, Ulrike)...and on and on the list goes of gentle reminders of His faithful love that surrounds me. As I returned today from Newark, the snow was lightly falling and I thought I could complain about the cold reality of winter, or I could choose to be thankful for the seasons we experience here in Ohio. The death that brings new life in the Spring. I have always liked the snow...just not the cold...but the snow couldn't happen without the cold! The snow reminds me of God's washing me clean. Making the dreary, grey of winter...white, clean and new. I pray as the snow of God's love washes over you this winter season that you will choose to be thankful for the grace of His love gift...Jesus who makes all things new.

Today I went to Newark to visit my new great niece along with her parents. What a blessing to swaddle new life in my arms on a day that could bring such heart ache. Instead of sorrow...God gave me joy. I am feeling well and plan to make the most of these next 10 days before my next chemotherapy treatment.

I received permission to go to church on Sunday! I was instructed to arrive late and leave early! My white blood cell count was at a dangerously low level for me to fight off infection so, to arrive late and leave early was to avoid contact with people who may have been carrying unwanted germs! I have come to realize how much I look forward to the fellowship as much as the worship. Avoiding people is not biblical! Please forgive me for not hugging, shaking your hand or speaking to you on Sunday...I obeyed nurse Mitchell! I was so unprepared for the emotional jerk that hit me upon arriving in the sanctuary. I was so excited to be there...out in public after too long at home...that when I saw the Worthington Christian High School choir prepared to sing...it hit me like a Mack Truck. Tom and I both loved to hear the choir sing and especially at Christmas time. As usual they did an amazing job and if you saw me crying (uncontrollably) it wasn't because they made me sad...it was so many things...missing Tom, so thankful to be in church, wondering how the choir sounded with heavenly ears, wondering what it must be like to celebrate Christmas in heaven....etc.